It starts with the socks. Within three minutes of entering our home from being anywhere, my kids have ripped off their socks, leaving them splattered across the floor in multiple rooms of the house. (By the way, why do socks never stay together as pairs? Finding single socks in every nook and cranny is literally the bane of my existence. But I digress.)
With their bare feet pitter-pattering across the hardwood floor, I know it’s only a matter of time before the rest of the clothes come off too. Before I can even get the milk into the refrigerator, I turn to see two sets of butt cheeks jiggling away from me as my girls run off to play.
That’s right. My kids are nudists.
They freaking love being naked. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve uttered the phrase, “Please put your clothes back on,” or asked the question, “Why are you guys naked?” I would be a rich, rich woman.
Their response is always a simple, “We like to be naked.” I’ll hear them deeply emerged in imaginative play in the other room, only for one of them to all of a sudden declare, “Let’s be naked!” as if out of nowhere, while they were just in the middle of singing the alphabet, they decided it would be better to do so with no clothes on. Why?
I guess I (sort of) get it. Clothes can be restricting. But certainly not the stretchy, jersey knit ensembles that my kiddos wear every day. They’re comfy! Mommy spent hard earned money on those getups! It doesn’t matter – their clothes are coming off faster than you can say “indecent exposure.”
They would spend the whole day naked if they could. Most of the time, my husband and I insist that underwear must be worn – because, c’mon, we believe in a bit of modesty. And of course they don’t run around in the nude outside of our own home. But like I said, the minute we return, clothes are shed and dropped in little piles on the floor.
I’ve tried re-dressing them throughout the day, but by the fourth time, I give up. It’s a hassle. No sooner have I finished shoving toddler feet through tiny legging openings than I turn around and see a trail of clothes leading to my naked children sitting on the bed playing Barbies.
It’s not a game to them; they’re not doing it to spite me or to push my buttons because, in reality, I don’t really care. In an effort to instill positive body image for our children, we don’t really make a fuss over nudity. You want to hang out in your gutchies all day? More power to you. Looks a little cold to me in the dead of winter, but whatevs. (And seriously, a two-year-old in undies? Cute AF.)
Let’s be honest – moms and dads need to choose their battles. Preferring to be nude is not a battle I feel like tackling with two strong-willed munchkins. So yes, it wouldn’t be uncommon to see my husband and I sitting at the dinner table with two underwear-clad children.
Will there come a day when walking around the house sans clothes becomes inappropriate? Maybe. For now, I see no harm in a two and a four-year-old being comfortable in their own skins, preferring to jump on their mini-trampoline in the nude.
Our family and close friends who visit our home are used to being greeted at the door by at least one of the kids in some state of nakedness. Our guests are either fine with it or are secretly judging us. I don’t care either way.
But guess what? This whole nudist situation has been somewhat beneficial to my bank account. No need for ungodly amounts of kids clothes! My offspring choose to rock their birthday suits on the daily.
Bonus: saves on laundry.